Bad feelings don’t make you a bad person. Nor do they make you ungrateful.
Everyone is inclined to the odd intrusive thought now and then. It’s healthy and natural. These thoughts can feel ‘bad’. The kind of thoughts we feel we ‘shouldn’t’ be having or the kind of thoughts that make us question what kind of person we are.
These thoughts can take up more head space than they need to if we start to punish ourselves for even having them in the first place, let alone deal with the thoughts themselves.
It can often feel daunting to express negative thoughts because we sometimes feel we don’t have the right or that people may judge us for doing so.
It is important to remember that these kind of thoughts do not make up the whole of us. We are multi faceted beings, entitled to more than one thought or feeling about any given situation, person, or experience. Sometimes these thoughts and feelings can be contradictory. And that is OK too. Thoughts and feelings aren’t permanent. They come and go. They change. Just because we feel one way today doesn’t mean we will feel that way forever or even tomorrow.
The real danger comes when we don’t allow ourselves to acknowledge our ‘less desirable’ thoughts for fear it makes us ‘bad’ or ‘says something’ about the kind of person we are. IT DOESN’T. It simply means we are human and we are changeable and sometimes we don’t always just settle on a thought or feeling right off without sifting through possibilities first. Maybe we really DO have more than one way of thinking or feeling about an experience we went through or a situation we find ourselves in and that is OK too.
All thoughts and feelings are valid and deserve your time and attention. They also deserve to be expressed and heard without judgement. Maybe then they might start to feel OK.
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